Apparently, in the the process of planning for the big armed militia party at Malheur Wildlife Refuge in Burns, everyone remembered to bring their extra camo cargo pants but no one packed snacks.

On Monday, the group – known as Citizens for Constitutional Freedom, the #TaliBanjo or Y’all Qaeda, depending on who’s doing the talking — sent out a social media plea for snacks to sustain them through their wait-and-see standoff with law enforcement.

On Reddit, people are already preparing care packages for the long eastern Oregon winter. However, the suggested treats, including everything from glitter to “a little spa party,” may not to be the militants’ liking.

That’s sweet. But these dudes are hungry.

So I’ve decided to put together my ultimate list of the best snacks to send to a self-styled militiaman from another state holed up in the middle of nowhere in your state.

Note: This is intended to be satire, with the hope that we can laugh about this whole crazy mess when it’s over (and soon).

I’m assuming they have a sense of humor. I mean, they did decide to make their big stand against at a closed avifauna sanctuary that no one had heard of until this week. (Speaking of which, I’m thinking they better think of an exit plan before ticked off bird watchers show up in the spring and take matters into their own hands.)

— Drew Vattiat of The Oregonian contributed to this story.

— Joseph Rose

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